Whaaa.... 8 million dude....
Look out! It's 2, count em, 2 days in a ROW! However, it's now 11:42 11:43 and I've told myself that I'd be in bed tonight before the A.M. so I really don't have long here. That's ok though because I really only wanted to do a quick Top Ten List for your reading pleasure!
Here goes nothing!
Top Ten Reasons I Don't Miss Smoking Weed
10- Feeling like someone dumped a mixture of whole wheat flour and crazy glue in my mouth.
9- Being paranoid in general but more specifically, being afraid I am going to forget how to breathe.
8- Trying to keep up with all of the new and cool ways to smoke weed. I draw a line when people buy WWII gas masks at surplus stores.
7- Hanging out with other people who smoke weed and realizing that I might actually look/act like they do...
6- Buying weed. Or associating with those who sell it.
5- Driving to stores at 4:00 in the morning for twinkies, chocolate milk, hot dogs and a pound of bacon.
4- Buying Viseine and being well aware that the clerk knows damn well it's not for hay fever.
3- Losing my glasses when they're on my face.
2- Driving fried and feeling the need to slow down and realizing that I'm doing 63km/hour in an 80km/hour zone.
and the number one reason I don't miss smoking weed is.... Eating something that has no business going into my mouth because it's dirty/expired or not widely known as edible and getting asked why I'm doing it and not having an answer.
There you have it, my first attempt at a top ten list. Maybe Dave's safe for now. Just wait until I master this skill! Poop, it's 11:58! Gotta run, I still have to pee and brush my teeth!
Stay classy internet!
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